Brief Hiatus

Sorry folks, there will be no show tonight -- The Soap Show will be on a brief hiatus. Check back in the new year for details about the conclusion of Season 2, aboard our beloved Colossal Princess.

Episode Four Recap

The Colossal Princess leaves Mexico and sets sail for Jamaica!

Beatrice “Trixie” Godsey is welcomed aboard The Colossal Princess! What better place for a Mormon but on a single’s cruise in the Caribbean…? Oh wait, she plans to “bring God to the natives.” That explains it.

Captain James Rudder recognizes her immediately! Does she recognize him from his bronzed Hawaiian surfer days…??

Pierre LaNeuf becomes the new ATTC (Assistant to the Captain) after he beats acting ATTC Rayn Peyton in a battle of Nautical Knowledge! Rayn can do nothing but slink away in utter shame while she watches Pierre learn to steer the ship in her place.

Debbie Dallas finally returns to The Colossal Princess after being stranded on Bermuda with Sea Madness! A heroic rescue, manned by none other than Captain James Rudder, brings her safely back aboard. Much to the relief of Rayn, one of her first acts is to reinstate the former ATTC to full duty!

Doc Mac is beginning to hear voices and it’s suspected he has finally contracted Sea Madness! Tory Tonka has Pierre LaNeuf speechless when she reveals that she is pregnant! And Donna Dickie manages the complex feat of locking herself in her stateroom!

Meanwhile our special guest David Blair blows us away with his musical splendour! Why, anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady... very worthwhile advice.

Will Donna find her way out of her stateroom in time for dinner? What will Pierre do now that he’s about to become a daddy? And will Doc Mac be cured of his Sea Madness before it’s too late? Find out on the next episode of The Soap Show, Monday November 15th at 8pm at The Firehall Arts Centre.

Episode Three Recap

Destination: Mexico!

Little Jenny, aged 9 ½ and more than a little odd, arrives on the Lido deck of the Colossal Princess all by herself. She explains that she’s been sent on the cruise by her mother. Although she arrived all alone, Jenny and Captain James Rudder soon become good friends and spend the cruise having heart-to-hearts, playing poker with the other crew members and playing with guns.

Debbie Dallas, original Cruise Director of The Colossal Princess, remains stranded on Bermuda with Sea Madness, enslaving birds and befriending jars of mayonnaise. There she meets a dashing and handsome native and falls madly in love with him…

Filling in for Debbie Dallas is Doc Mac, who does his very best to keep the guests entertained with disco spots and Hypnosis-to-Cure-your Sea-Sickness Workshops. He finds the Cruise Director shoes to be very big ones to fill!

Special guest star Riel Hahn sings a wonderful diddy about living in a communist country and receives wild applause from the gathered passengers, who begin doling out the buffet in equal sized portions.

As the episode continues, we discover that Gabriel Flores’ lost eye, though disembodied, can still see! And that James Rudder is searching not only for his son, but for his lost mermaid princess, Turquoisina, who he vainly searches for as the ship enters the gulf of Mexico.

Will Debbie Dallas find true happiness with her new found native? Will Captain James Rudder rediscover his long lost mermaid love? Will Gabriel use the power of his disembodied eye for good… or evil?? Find out more in our next episode!

Episode Two Recap

Departing from the port of Hawaii, The Colossal Princess sets sail for Bermuda!

Debbie Dallas and Tory Tonka warmly welcomed aboard passenger Pierre LeNeuf (Peter New) who is shadowing – secretly – one of the crew members for his upcoming feature film role…

Trouble begins to surface after the ship makes its way through the Panama Canal (thanks to Tori Tonka’s expert traffic direction) and the crew members start to feel a little funny. 

Zita Fanata is the first to show symptoms. She begins to hear voices, experiences embarrassing gastrointestinal pain, and uncontrollably reads gossip columns about Matt Damon! To Doc Mac it’s all too clear that she has SEA MADNESS!

Cruise Director Debbie Dallas is the next to succumb to the devastating effects of the Madness. Then Tori, then Pierre! Only Captain James Rudder and Doc Mac seem to be immune. The race is on: to get to Bermuda in time to save the crew!

After a long, dangerous and arduous journey The Colossal Princess arrives in the port of Bermuda. The crew search madly for the Creole Voodoo Healer and the Turkey Plant that will save them. At long last the plant is discovered, and the crew is saved! 

Tori Tonka and Pierre LeNeuf, awash with relief, then succumb to an altogether different type of madness as their attraction to one another can no longer be denied. A painful goodbye follows, as Pierre decides to remain on Bermuda, while Tori must return to the ship. 

As The Colossal Princess makes to depart, so many questions remain unanswered… Will Tori and Pierre ever again have the chance to pursue their love? Has the crew been permanently cured of their Sea Madness?

And, now that we mention it… where is Cruise Director Debbie Dallas??

Join us next week to discover the fate of The Colossal Princess and her Courageous Crew!

Rayn Peyton Confesses

In episode 1, a taboo love affair between Rayn Peyton and passenger Jack Johnson was kept under wraps...

but when the dust fell...